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Posted July 12, 2021 at 6:20 am

The top half of this page was also a challenge because I can't easily visualize what a nice reaction to coming out would look like? It's not that I don't have any positive coming out experiences--my boyfriend was very supportive, and I've had nice receptions online--but a few notable neutral-to-negative ones have colored my memory overall.

I also suspect that my overall psychology makes me prefer a different reaction than a lot of other trans people (including Jasper) might like. My feeling is that most trans folks want people to respond with understated acceptance, to not make too big a deal about it or ask too many invasive questions. I, on the other hand, want people to ask questions and want them to make a big deal about it (in an enthusiastic, woke way, of course) or else I'm going to think, "Oh, am I bothering them? Are they bored hearing about this? Do they secretly think I'm crazy but are too polite to say so? Do they want me to stop talking about this so they'll feel more comfortable?" I think the ideal reaction I want to hear is something like: "Wow! You're trans? How cool! I would like to hear you continue to talk about this for the next twenty to thirty minutes!" My two modes are Will Talk a Lot (if given explicit permission) or Will Not Talk At All.